Beautifully Revealed Read online

  I step closer to him and wipe it with my thumb, and his eyes close at my gentle touch. The entire time in Chicago he held these emotions back, and I wish he would let me help him. He can’t keep everything bottled up forever, it will suffocate him. I’ve been suffocating on my pain for years and I don’t want that for him. That single tear is the only sign of grief I’ve seen him express all week and it worries me.

  He reaches out and cups my face in both his hands, his green eyes so stormy with emotion they’re almost a shade of gray. “When you leave me I won’t be the same man, it will break me to pieces. I need to hold on to what’s left of me.”

  “Please don’t do this,” I beg.

  “Ella, what happened with Lucas is tearing me up. I haven’t touched you in a week because I’m afraid of what I’ll do to you to erase his touch. I want to fuck you until you feel me in your sleep. I want to fuck you till you have no memory of any other man. I warned you before you left that Lucas would manipulate you, now I want to punish you so badly that I have to leave.”

  He did warn me, but I wouldn’t listen because I was so sure of myself, I would never betray Liam. I never dreamed Lucas would take the choice away from me. I know I can’t stop him, but he shouldn’t be the one leaving.

  “I’ll go. This is your home; I should be the one to leave.”

  “No. Where would you go?”

  “I’ll find a place. Maybe I’ll go stay at the Brazilian Court.”

  “Ella, you know how expensive it is to stay there? You won’t take my money so stay here and I’ll go downstairs.”

  “You’re not the only one with millions in the bank! I can afford to stay at the Brazilian.” I scream at him in frustration. I didn’t mean to say that much, but I hate when he throws his money at me.

  “What do you mean? You have millions in the bank?” He eyes me suspiciously. I know I messed up big now. This slip-up is going to cost me, he’s going to take this as another lie and use it to push me further away.

  “I have a hefty bank account and a substantial investment portfolio.” The confession weighs heavy on my chest. I have never disclosed this part of my life to anyone, not even Lucas. A wry smile appears on his face and he shakes his head in disbelief.

  “Maybe you should go, because it seems like I’ll never be done discovering your secrets.” He heads into his study, angrily slamming the door behind him.

  I pack quickly, only taking what I can carry, hoping I’ll get a chance to come back. I pause at the study door, lightly pushing it open, but Liam doesn’t look up. He knows I’m there, but he refuses to have any more contact with me so I leave with a heavy heart.

  ********

  Last night was horrible. Not that I didn’t see it coming or deserve it, but sleeping without Liam is hard. When I finally did fall asleep I was comforted by dreams of him. If I could, I would erase the last two weeks because going to Vegas was a mistake. I thought I needed to fix my friendship with Lucas, but I should’ve been more concerned with maintaining the peace I had finally found with Liam.

  Anna’s death was agonizing. I never experienced death on this level, I’ve always been unattached and unfeeling. In my early years with Damon I often thought death might have relieved my pain, stopped the suffering. I used to look at it like it was salvation, but experiencing the death of someone I loved like a mother ripped my heart out. As much as I wanted to ball up in a corner and cry, I stayed strong for Liam.

  The weight of his guilt combined with his grief was too much for him to bear alone. I needed to help him grieve more than I needed to grieve myself, but last night I finally shattered. Alone in an unnecessarily large hotel room, the grief finally consumed me. Flashes of the years I spent with Anna, imagining what life would have been like if she would have been my mother painfully eating away at my resolve not to cry.

  She made a huge mistake by not reaching out to Liam all those years, but that didn’t make her any less of a good mother. She suffered through abuse to stay with Liam as long as she did so on the scale of bad mothers, Anna’s mistake didn’t even register on the chart my mom sat on.

  As much as I’d like to scream at the sky about how unfair it is that the only person who felt like a mom to me was taken away, I can’t. Instead I’m thankful for having known her and the gift she left behind to me in her son. So when the tears finally came, they were tears of pain, sorrow, and thankfulness. Not many good things happen for me in this life and Anna Fields was a great thing.

  ********

  I walk into the office in the morning hoping I don’t look as bad as I feel. In my rational mind I know it’s ridiculous, but I miss Liam to an unbearable extent. I guess love isn’t rational. It’s illogical and foolish. It makes me feel like a raving lunatic one moment, blissfully content the following day.

  Lillian is not at her desk so I head to Rich’s office. This time I knock and wait until he yells for me to enter, lest I get another live porn show. Fortunately, Rich is alone. He waves for me to take a seat while he finishes a call. He cuts it short and gives me an odd look.

  “What’s wrong?” he asks. Is it that obvious? I must look like shit.

  “Everything.” I slump over in my seat.

  “Care to elaborate?”

  “Well Vegas was a disaster. After the news about Anna, I felt really bad for Lucas so I slept in his bed to comfort him.”

  “Oh oh, sounds bad already.”

  “Yeah it was because I woke up in the morning to Lucas molesting me.”

  Rich sits up in his seat and his eyebrows furrow. “What do you mean molesting you?”

  “I mean putting his hand into my panties while I was asleep. Then to make matters worse, as if he didn’t violate me enough, he throws it in Liam’s face at the hospital. Their mother is in the room dying and they’re having a pissing contest in the hallway. What kind of shit is that?”

  Rich shakes his head in disbelief. “You might not want to hear this, but I think Lucas is selfish. Everything you’ve ever told me about him points in that direction. This only makes it worse. He doesn’t want to see you happy unless you’re with him, and throwing how he took advantage of you in Liam’s face only proves it.”

  Lucas is my friend. My only friend for ten years, but as much as I hate to hear it, Rich is right. Lucas has probably been selfish from the beginning, but I was too busy being manipulative to care. So maybe back then we deserved each other. Getting what we needed out of each other in underhanded ways. I don’t want to be that way anymore and I definitely don’t want a friend who wants to destroy what’s most important to me.

  “Liam put me out last night,” I confess. There might be something to this opening up to people after all, because soon as I say the words the tightening in my chest releases a little.

  “What? Where did you go?”

  “He didn’t actually put me out, he offered to leave, but I didn’t feel right about chasing him away from his home so I offered to leave instead. I got a room at the Brazilian Court.”

  “Well you’re not staying there. You’re coming to stay with me.”

  “Not a good idea, Rich. Liam is already suspicious of our friendship. Staying with you would only fuel the flames.”

  “What better way to get a man to come to his senses than to make him crazy with jealousy.”

  “Fine, I’ll come stay with you, but only because that hotel room is so lonesome. Now enough about me, how are things with Lillian?”

  His face falls and he drops his head back against his chair. “She won’t even look at me, and I’m lucky to get a few words out of her when we’re here.”

  “Before I left you were talking about taking her out on a real date. What went wrong?”

  “Her son walked in on us last week, and let’s just say he saw a lot more than you saw that day you walked in on us.”

  “Oh my god Rich, that’s horrible. He’s probably traumatized.”

  “He wasn’t supposed to come home that night, in hindsight I guess I should’ve a
t least taken it to her room but the kid went crazy on me.”

  “Kid? You’re practically the same age.”

  “No, he’s a twenty-year-old college kid. When I was his age I was graduating magna cum laude.”

  “Well we can’t all be super geeks,” I laugh at him.

  “I may be a fucking genius, but I’m not a geek.” He crosses his arms over his chest.

  “I don’t know how you’re going to dig yourself out of this one.”

  “Seems like we’re in the same boat so pack your shit, and get over to my place tonight. We’ll make popcorn and watch sappy love movies while we sulk.”

  “Aww…I’ve never done that before.” My eyes glaze over with unexpected emotion. I quickly get up and head for the door before I get all mushy, but I pause before turning the knob. “Thanks, Rich,” I say, looking over my shoulder.

  He winks at me and smiles. “Anytime.”

  Chapter 7

  Isabella

  That night I knock on Rich’s door with my duffel bag on my shoulder, wishing I could just turn around and go home to Liam. Rich opens the door in a pair of sweatpants, a t-shirt, and a huge smile on his face.

  “You’re just in time.” He grabs the bag from my shoulder and pulls me in. He lives in a fourth floor condo that’s been recently developed less than ten minutes from Liam’s place. We enter the living room filled with plush carpet and gray furniture. The high ceilings make the place feel spacious, yet homey. He pulls me up the staircase, way too enthusiastic to have a houseguest.

  “This is where you’re sleeping.” He opens the first door in a long hallway and leads me into a large bedroom decorated in beige and brown tones. The bed has a ton of pillows on it, and I can’t wait to throw myself on that bed and get lost in them.

  “There’s a private bathroom through there.” He points towards a door on to my right. “My room is the last door at the end of the hall.” He puts my bag down and pulls me into a hug. “Don’t look so sad. That man won’t last long without you. In the meantime, popcorn is in the microwave and I’m about to start the movie.”

  “Which movie are we watching?” I ask as he walks towards the door.

  “The Notebook.” He smiles at me.

  “No, absolutely not. What else do you have?”

  “A Walk to Remember?” he asks with a sheepish smile.

  “What the hell, Rich? Are you one of those people that like to cry when they’re heartbroken?” I’ll stay in this room before I fill my heart with more sadness.

  “I don’t cry so that doesn’t apply to me. I was just kidding, I won’t torture you that way. We’re watching This Means War.”

  “Seriously! One girl and two guys. That’s just perfect for me,” I say sarcastically.

  “I thought you might appreciate the irony,” he laughs on his way out and I can’t help but smile. Maybe staying here won’t be so bad. Rich always bring out the fun in everything.

  ********

  I haven’t seen Liam in four days and I’m constantly fighting back the feeling of despair. Rich tries his best to keep my spirits up, but he’s just as lovesick as I am. Each day I get in this elevator with my hand clutching the key card in my pocket that will take me up to Liam’s floor. The work week is almost over and if I don’t build up the courage to go see him soon, I’ll regret it all weekend.

  I quickly slide the card in the slot and pray I’m doing the right thing. I gave him his space as long as I could, now I just need to see his face, get lost in his eyes for a few minutes. It takes an eternity for the elevator to reach his floor. When the doors finally slide open, my legs feel heavy as I walk across the lobby.

  I nod at the receptionist and she gives me a surprised look. I guess my absence was well noted and filed in the “It’s over” bin. “Is anyone in with him?” I ask her.

  “No,” she answers as I walk towards his office. My heart is beating so fast I can hear it pounding in my ears. The door opens before I touch it and Liam is standing there, breathtaking in all black. His shirt outlines his powerful frame. A few buttons are left open at the top, exposing the tanned skin of his neck and upper chest. His slacks are snug and my eyes immediately trace the bulge in the front. He’s dark and dangerous today and my wild side wants to do deliciously wicked things to that body.

  Butterflies flutter in my belly when he smiles at me. I evaluate that smile trying to decipher what it could mean. Was he done keeping his distance from me? Maybe he’s ready for me to come home? This is silly, I’ve been with the man in a hundred different positions and I’m still flustered every time he simply glances at me. I want him so badly I have to hide my trembling hands in my pockets.

  He pulls me through the door and up against his body. He smells like soap, the aroma tempts me to taste the smooth skin of his neck. His warm breath caresses my ear and my body instantly responds. My nipples harden and the ache increases between my legs. I lean my head back and stare into his lust filled eyes as our labored breaths linger in the air as we inch closer. His lips take an eternity to reach mine, but when they do it’s a tender caress, a slow exploration of the longing we share.

  It doesn’t take long before our slow kiss turns into a deep heated kiss, with us battling to consume each other. Our hands fumble with buttons and zippers between those kisses. My body is screaming at me for this release, yearns for the feel of his thick shaft sinking deep into me.

  “I came to see you last night.” He whispers against my lips as my fingers graze the heated flesh inside his form-fitted boxer briefs. “They said you weren’t staying there. Where are you staying?” My hand freezes and I stare at him panic-stricken.

  No, no, no, if I tell him I’m staying with Rich now, it will be like throwing a bucket of ice water on him and my opportunity to have him will disappear. I rain kisses up his neck in an effort to preserve the moment, but he freezes up, and holds me off within arm’s reach.

  “Where are you staying, Ella?” His voice is cold and his eyes suspicious.

  “With Rich,” I answer honestly. I have no reason to feel bad about staying with a friend. Just because his jealousy refuses to let him see the truth, I won’t act guilty. A deep frown mars his beautiful face before he steps back and begins to readjust his clothes.

  “You’re staying with Harris?” He shakes his head, avoiding any eye contact with me.

  “I’m not going to go through my friendship with Rich with you again. I needed a friend and Rich is helping chase away the loneliness.”

  “I’m sure he is,” he says with a hint of sarcasm.

  “You don’t trust me and I don’t know how to fix that.”

  “How the fuck am I supposed to trust you,” he snaps. “You never let me in, I’m constantly learning things you should have revealed months ago and you have a bevy of men at your beck and call.” He throws his hands up in defeat and walks off towards his desk. “I have work to do,” he says, dismissing me.

  I watch him until he’s seated trying to come up with anything that will fix this. Fix us. I know words are not what he needs from me. He needs me to prove my love through actions, but I’m still learning how to do that. I just hope it’s not too late by the time I figure it all out.

  Liam

  She’s finally going to do it.

  I’ve been watching Ella will herself not to come up here for days. The small glimpses of her I get on the screen only make me miss her more. I want to touch her, smell her, and hear her tell me she loves me. Last night I caved. I couldn’t sleep and thoughts of her were too overwhelming. Maybe it was a sign that she wasn’t at the hotel I went to, that I should maintain the space between us, but as I watch her get off the elevator I decide to meet her at the door. It slides open just as she appears in front of it. She shouldn’t look so good when I’m so miserable without her. The vest she’s wearing over her shirt is too tight, the button near her bust line is near bursting off, and that skirt…

  If I get my way I’ll have that skirt wrapped around her waist in less tha
n five minutes. I reach out and pull her in, her soft curves crashing into my chest. She leans back and I get lost in her smoky gray eyes. It’s still there, the invisible force that pulls at my heart and soul at the sight of her. When our lips touch I savor the moment, hoping to express my feeling with a simple kiss. But as usual, a tender kiss ignites a fire in us that has us tearing at each other’s clothes. Her soft hand skims across my abs and creeps into my pants, her fingers feel like silk against my rock hard erection.

  “I came to see you last night,” I confess. “They said you weren’t staying there. Where are you staying?”

  Her body tenses up and her eyes are immediately alarmed and fearful. She snaps out of it quickly though, ignoring my question, and trying to distract me with her kisses. I hold her off and force her to look at me.

  “Where are you staying, Ella?”

  “With Rich,” she answers, and just like that my hard-on is forgotten and my anger threatens to erupt.

  “You’re staying with Harris?” I begin to fix my clothes. My moment of weakness is over. I missed her so much I was ready to forgive her, bury myself deep inside her, and let her wrap me in her love.

  “I’m not going to go through my friendship with Rich with you again. I needed a friend and Rich is helping chase away the loneliness.”

  “I’m sure he is,” I say annoyed with her excuses.

  “You don’t trust me and I don’t know how to fix that.”

  “How the fuck am I supposed to trust you,” I surprise myself by my angry tone. “You never let me in, I’m constantly learning things you should have revealed months ago, and you have a bevy of men at your beck and call.” I’m done with this shit or at least I wish I could be. What is it with this woman that makes me willing to go hell and back for her? She’s standing there staring at me, but I really need her to leave before I cave in.